Hey!
So I made up this term ‘verbal insurance’ because I don’t know how to describe this thing I wanted to reflect on. Here’s a tweet that highlights my general point:
So instead of expressing ourselves confidently, we habitually add phrases that provide ‘insurance’ to whatever we claim.
Phrases like:
I think…
…I guess
If I’m not wrong…
If I remember correctly…
… but I could be wrong.
…idk.
…but it’s up to you.
…but it’s fine.
Does this sound familiar?
And yes, I am very much aware that this can be attributed to years of men making women and other marginalized groups feel unsure of themselves. And it also may be due to oppressive labeling of people being difficult or arrogant when they do this.
And finally yes, I am aware of my privilege to write this. But that doesn’t make this idea any less important.
We really shouldn’t feel the need to pad what we’re saying. Because you know what? If we’re wrong, we’re wrong. It is what it is.
So when you say something you are sure of, please own it. It makes every form of communication with any other human being so much more meaningful.
But why is this important?
The way we write, type and speak, significantly affects our self-confidence. Writing without unnecessary fillers will dismantle two huge self-limiters - our fear of rejection and negative self-beliefs.
We will get into the habit of believing in ourselves and feeling more secure about our thoughts. I don’t believe in fake it til you make it but uhh just do it til you feel it? Yeah, I’ll work on that.
Have an amazing week 💪🏾
Arun
🚀 If you found this useful and know someone who uses too much verbal insurance, please share this with them.
My latest podcast:
In this episode, we cover what Kimmy does as a pharmacist based in London, how it was working through the pandemic, what she does to improve her mental well-being, and also how she deals with certain self-limiting beliefs such as fear of judgment impostor syndrome, and self-doubt.
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About Me
My name is Arun and I'm a 4th-year medical student at King's College London. I'm also a certified personal trainer and lifestyle photographer.
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For thoughts about this newsletter, please drop an email at hello@arunjayaraj.com
Its also stems from low self-esteem and self-limiting beliefs